Want to last longer in bed without panic or pills? Ejaculatory control is a skill you can improve with a few simple habits. This page gives clear methods you can try tonight, plus longer-term fixes that actually work.
Start-stop method — during sex or masturbation, stimulate until you feel close, then stop for 20–30 seconds until the urge eases. Repeat this cycle 3–4 times before allowing ejaculation. It trains your body to tolerate higher arousal before climax.
Squeeze method — when you’re near orgasm, press the head or base of the penis firmly for 5–10 seconds until the feeling drops. This lowers arousal enough to continue. Use this with a partner or practice on your own to learn the right pressure and timing.
Breathing and focus — take slow, deep belly breaths during sex. Count four seconds in, hold a second, and breathe out for six. Slower breathing downshifts the nervous system and cuts the rush toward climax.
Distract smartly — brief, light distraction (a mental image that’s not sexual) can help if you’re right at the edge. Don’t overdo it; the goal is to reduce urgency, not lose connection with your partner.
Kegel exercises — yes, men have them too. Find the pelvic floor by stopping urine midstream once (don’t make this a habit). Squeeze that muscle for 3–5 seconds, relax 3–5 seconds. Do 10–15 reps, three times a day. Over weeks you’ll build control and can use quick contractions during sex to delay ejaculation.
Topical anesthetics — creams or sprays with 5–10% lidocaine or benzocaine reduce sensitivity. Apply 10–15 minutes before sex, then wipe off excess. They often work well, but can numb both partners if not used carefully.
Oral options — some men find short-acting SSRIs like dapoxetine helpful; others benefit from off-label use of daily SSRIs prescribed by a doctor. These require medical advice because of side effects and interactions.
Behavior and counseling — anxiety, performance pressure, and relationship issues are common causes. Sex therapy or short-term counseling can fix patterns that medication alone won’t touch. Communication with your partner about pace, foreplay, and expectations helps a lot.
When to see a doctor — if early ejaculation happens most times and it bothers you or your partner, book an appointment. A doctor can check for medical causes (like thyroid issues, prostatitis, or medication side effects) and suggest a safe treatment plan.
Try a mix: use quick techniques tonight, start daily Kegels, and talk to a clinician if progress stalls. Small, consistent changes often give the best, lasting results.
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